


skeletons and ghosts [ a post series broadchurch fic ]

by badkindofbutterflies



Category: Broadchurch
Genre: Alec and Ellie are Married, Angst, Drama, Drama & Romance, F/F, F/M, Fluff, M/M, Mattie Hardy, Murder Mystery, Mystery, Post-Canon, Sorry I ship them and now they have a child together, Sorry Not Sorry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-17
Updated: 2020-08-23
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:21:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24238720
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/badkindofbutterflies/pseuds/badkindofbutterflies
Summary: When tragedy strikes, Mattie Hardy turns to her parents - detectives Alec Hardy and Ellie Miller-Hardy - for answers. In turn, she opens a closet full of skeletons and takes it upon herself to clean it out.
Relationships: Alec Hardy/Ellie Miller
Comments: 6
Kudos: 53





	1. Chapter 1

“Well, lass, I ought to say that you’re the best damned veterinarian I’d ever come across. Perhaps, even the best in the country!”

Mattie Hardy, barely 18 years old and without any formal education in the veterinary sciences, let out a laugh and finished packing her things away, “I’m only an assistant.” She remembered the farmer, an older fellow named Rubert Hines. “But I appreciate it! Maybe one day I’ll officially have the “doctor” in front of my name.”

Rubert shook his head, patting the girl’s shoulder before making his way towards his prized sow and her newborn calf, “Ya don’t need any fancy titles to be good at what ya do.” He promised, sending her a cheeky wink. “How’re your parents? Still working on the Lamont case?”

Mattie slung her bag over her shoulder, letting out a small groan at just the idea of having to go home and spend another dinner listening to her parents argue over who was the famed car thief. “Yeah, this one has really got them going mad. It’s not such a big deal though; just someone roaming the countryside and stealin’ cars. Not like anybody’s gettin’ murdered.” She rubbed her neck and shook her head, cracking a grin, “But on the brightside, since they’re so focused on the case, I get the telly to myself every night now.” 

“Aye, everythin’s got a silver lining, huh? You tell ‘em I said hi!” Rubert waved to Mattie as she turned to leave, the brunette waving right back, “Will do!”

* * *

“Mum, dad, I’m home!” Mattie shouted as she pushed through the door and into the kitchen, “Oh, geez, what smells like burning?” She muttered, rubbing her nose. Instantly, her mum burst out laughing, “What’d I tell you, Alec? I told you you burnt the shite out of that fish!” Her mother was grinning ear to ear and Mattie had to snort in amusement, glancing at her indignant father.

“I didn’t burn it! It’s supposed to be nice and tender!” Alec retorted, waving his tongs as his wife, “Quit laughin’ at me, Ellie, or I’ll come over there and-”

“Okay, okay, your daughter is here, can you not flirt in front of me? It’s gross.” Mattie wrinkled her nose, tossing her bag on the table.

“We eat there, y’know? We don’t need your manure crusted bag on our dinner table!” Ellie stood and grappled the bag off the table, setting it gently on the ground. “Yeesh, I thought I taught you better.”

“Apparently not.” Mattie teased, kissing her mum’s cheek before she toddered over to her father and leaned over his shoulder, “Oof, mum’s not kidding; you killed that fish a second time.” She muttered, Alec gently pushing his daughter away.

“Alright, alright! I’ll order some food then! Yeesh, everybody’s a critic.” He grumbled, turning the burner off and tossing the pan into the sink.

Ellie and Mattie shared a triumphant grin.

* * *

Within an hour, they were all sharing a pizza at the dinner table. “You lot seem to be in a good mood today; somethin’ happen at work?” Mattie asked with her mouth full. 

“We finally arrested the culprit for the Lamont case; recovered all of the cars too.” Alec sounded pretty triumphant, but Ellie took that right away.

“Aye! I solved it - don’t forget that minor detail.” She waggled her finger at her husband, narrowing her eyes at him as if warning him not to argue. He just raised his hands defensively in return, “Yeah, yeah, your mother solved it, Mrs. Brains of the Operation.” 

Mattie grinned at her parents. It was hard not to be proud of them; she knew they’d worked hard to get to where they were, especially raising four children. Her half sister and brothers were out of the house now, her sister Daisy working as an accountant in Bristol while her brother Fred was in uni in Edinborough and her brother Tom was working as a plumber and electrician. They were older than her, though she was only 4 years apart from Fred. 

She didn’t know too much about her half siblings’ other parent, knowing that Daisy and her mum didn’t get on well and her brothers’ father had left when they were younger. Her parents didn’t like to talk about it and Mattie got it; why bring up old relationships when you can move on and be happy?

“That’s awesome! Who was it?” Mattie asked curiously, glancing between her parents.

“Some bloke who owns an auto shop in the area. He had multiple guys doing the job of stealing them and he would resell them for profit.” Ellie leaned back in her seat, rubbing her nose. “All of ‘em have been arrested though, so provided everything goes smoothly in court, this case will be closed.”

Mattie nodded, still chowing down on her pizza, “Sounds super fun.”

“Oh, loads.” Alec muttered sarcastically, smirking when his daughter shot him an annoyed look, “Anyways, what’re you up to for the rest of the night, missy?”

“Going out with Jaden.” Mattie took a long sip of water, “He has a new boyfriend he wants to introduce me to, apparently.” She leaned back in her seat, “Nothing more fun than third-wheeling.”

Perhaps she got her sarcasm from her father.

Alec snorted in amusement, “Oh, see, now look what sounds ‘super fun’.”

Of course, he had to duck as a wadded napkin came flying towards him.

* * *

Jaden had been Mattie’s best friend since grade school. They were two peas in a pod, both getting into mischief and probably reasons why both their parents had higher blood pressure. Jaden was always the class clown, a boisterous lad with a happy go lucky personality. Mattie was more cynical, sarcastic and had a temper. They seemed to balance each other out.

They’d met each other after Mattie socked Jaden in the head with a football. Even now, Mattie would joke about how Jaden wailed like a baby for hours after, though Jaden would defensively declare that he hadn’t cried at all. In fact, according to Jaden, he was steel faced and acted like it hadn’t hurt at all.

The truth lay somewhere in the middle of the two’s wildly different accounts.

From then on, they were inseparable. At 15, Jaden came out to Mattie in a whirlwind of tears and snot. Mattie spent the entire night with him and was close by when he told his parents. When Jaden decided to begin working instead of going to Uni, Mattie was close behind, making the decision to wait a while and begin work as a vet assistant. Broadchurch didn’t have a decent vet for miles, so Mattie became the unqualified veterinarian to some in the town. Jaden worked hard as a fisherman, though on his nights off, he’d begun to work more on his writing. He’d sworn for as long as Mattie knew him, he was going to be an author some day. He was a great storyteller, Mattie had promised him, but had to lay off all of the romantics or else she wouldn’t be able to read them without getting sick.

Jaden retaliated by giving her a set of romantic novels for her birthday.

* * *

“C’mon, Jaden, it’s bloody freezing.” Mattie muttered underneath her breath, gazing out at the ocean. She shifted from one foot to the other, glancing down at her phone to see the time. 

12:24 AM.

She’d been waiting for him for about an hour now and she’d been late. Chewing on her lower lip, she glanced about again and just snorted, “Wanker’s probably getting it on; forgetting about his friend now that he’s frenching some bloke.” 

Nudging the sand with her toe, she began to head down the beach, deciding that she’d give Jaden ten more minutes before she called it a night. She kept her head up, glancing about to see if she could spy him and his boyfriend about anywhere.

As she began passing by the cliffs, Mattie decided to turn back around and go back towards the town’s main stretch. She paused her walking and began turning, when a darkened lump on the beach caught her attention.

Curiosity killed the cat, but alas, Mattie still began walking toward it with an inquisitive look on her face. As she approached, she recognized Jaden’s figure, lying in the sand.

“Jaden, you lump! You make me wait for an hour to bloody stargaze!” Mattie huffed out loud, storming up to him and nudging him with her foot. 

There was no response, Mattie tilting a brow and gazing down at him. “Jaden?”

His eyes were open, unseeing. Her hands shaking, she knelt down and tried to play off her worry with an amused scoff, “Okay, Jay, joke’s up! You got me.” 

Still, no response. Mattie leaned forward to hesitantly touch his cheek. “Jay?”

His skin was cold. Mattie could feel herself disconnecting from her body, as if she were going into shock. With shaky hands, she pressed her fingers to her best friend’s neck. 

There was no pulse under her fingertips.

Jaden was dead.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> on to chapter two!  
> i try and reread every chapter before i post, but if there's any mistakes, yell at my dyslexia pls and thank you  
> bit of a filler chapter but its important  
> once again i appreciate any love or advice or critques in the comments below; i read them all!

Ellie was fast asleep when she got the call from her daughter. She couldn’t even get out a hello before Mattie started sobbing into the phone and told her of Jaden’s death. Within minutes, both she and Alec were springing out of bed and ringing their colleagues. 

It was 1 in the morning by the time everyone had arrived, Ellie and Alec rushing in shortly after.

“Where’s Mattie?” Ellie had no regrets about that being her first thought on the scene of a death, as family always came first to her and always would.

“Mum, dad.” Her daughter’s broken voice filled Ellie’s heart with anguish. She turned to see her daughter stumbling towards them, her face blotchy from crying. 

“Oh, my love.” Ellie whispered, rushing in to embrace her daughter tightly. Mattie folded into her arms and began sobbing again, clinging to her like she had when she was a child. 

Her husband came up after speaking with the officers who’d arrived first, his hand resting gently on Mattie’s shoulder. He didn’t say anything, which Ellie suspected was because there was truly nothing you could say in a situation like this.

As soon as Mattie pulled back though, she was engulfed by Alec, who held her tightly against his chest. Ellie took a step back, wiping her eyes and letting out a quiet, shuddering breath as she pulled herself together. “Was it a suicide?” She was surprised at how steady her voice was, her eyes meeting that of the supervising officer.

“Thought it was, DI Hardy, but it looks like there’s evidence of strangulation.” 

* * *

Ellie had worked so hard to put the past behind her; she’d gotten promoted DI, fell in love again with Alec, had a daughter with him, and created a life for her and all of her kids that was safe and happy. 

Yet, somehow, as she stared at the body of her daughter’s best friend, she was taken right back to 20 years ago, when Danny Latimer was murdered by Ellie’s own husband.

She wanted to throw up.

The body had made it through the autopsy and now she was awaiting the results. Alec had taken Mattie home and decided to stay with her until she was coherent again. Ellie kept her phone close, just in case Alec decided to call her.

“DI Hardy?” The coroner came into the room with her and passed her a clipboard with the results from the autopsy. “Cause of death was strangulation; the bruising on the poor chap’s neck suggests a rope or something of the sort.” 

Ellie furrowed her brow, “Like he hung himself?” 

“That’s the thing; the bruising is only toward the front of the neck, which would mean that he was forcibly strangled.” The coroner responded, pointing again to the clipboard, “We put the time of death around about 22:30.” 

“He was murdered.” Ellie breathed, glancing up at the coroner, who shrugged in response. 

“Murdered, yeah, or just a mugging gone wrong? Got in a scrap and things went awry?” He offered, though he was quickly shut down when Ellie glared at him, “Murder is murder; doesn’t matter how it happens.”

“Ah, right, well, if there’s anything else I can do, let me know.” 

Ellie gave the man a nod and small smile, “Thank you.”

He left and Ellie stood there for a few more moments, just staring down at Jaden’s body. She swallowed hard and gently rested her hand on his shoulder, “Thank you for taking care of my daughter, Jaden.” Her voice was a soft murmur, “You were a good friend to her.”

Blinking back tears, the detective straightened up and left the room, contemplating her next move.

* * *

“Is she asleep?” Ellie asked as she entered their living room, leaning against the door frame.

Alec nodded, muting the telly and turning his body to face her, “She was right exhausted; fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.”

Ellie breathed a sigh of relief, “Good. I was worried she wouldn’t get any rest.” She rubbed her face, moving to sit beside her husband. “Autopsy said he was strangled, Alec.”

Furrowing his brow, Alec grasped his tea and took a long sip. Ellie just studied him, tired and weary after the events that night, “Just like-”

“Danny and Jaden happened 20 years apart, El. They didn’t know each other and Joe’s been long gone since you lot chased him out of town.” Alec gently rested his hand on Ellie’s thigh, giving her a soft look, “You can’t compare the two.”

Ellie leaned back on the couch, “I know, I know. I just think this’ll bring up everything again, y’know? Mattie doesn’t even know about any of that; how is she going to react?”

A heavy breath left Alec’s lips, “We don’t know that, El. If it does, we’ll cross that bridge when it comes.” He rubbed his neck, pausing for a moment in thought, “But if it doesn’t, well, what she doesn’t know won’t kill her.”

* * *

Ellie’s 6 o’clock alarm came much earlier that morning, the detective feeling like a sack of bricks as soon as she got out of bed. She made her way to the bathroom, getting freshened up and putting on her suit for work. 

It was going to be hard to leave Mattie less than 12 hours after her best friend was murdered, but she knew that Mattie would want her to get started on the case as soon as possible. Alec had already gotten up and left, though Ellie would be surprised if he had gone to bed at all. 

Peeking in on her daughter’s room, she sighed with quiet relief to see that she was still asleep. She studied her for a moment, unsure if she should go in at all. 

“Mum, why ya staring at me?” Mattie suddenly mumbled, her words slurring from still being half-asleep. 

“Go back to sleep, sweetheart.” Ellie murmured gently, “Just checking in on ya.”

Mattie sat up a bit, furrowing her brow and looking mildly confused at the sentiment. Ellie watched as her daughter’s face flickered with realization and she sank back in her bed, looking smaller than Ellie had ever seen her. 

“Right.” Mattie muttered, swallowing hard, “You’re, uh, you’re gonna work on his case, right?” She whispered quietly, so quiet that Ellie had to lean forward to hear her properly.

“Of course, dear. That’s the only thing I plan on working on.” Ellie promised her, moving in to sit on the edge of the bed, “Do you want me to stay home? I don’t mind.”

“No, please, go in. I’d rather you work on, uh, y’know.” Mattie rubbed her face, “I’mma go back to bed.” 

Ellie cracked a small smile, leaning in to kiss her daughter’s forehead. 

“Of course. Sleep well, sweetheart."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> once again, tad bit of a filler chapter but alas it moves the story along  
> most chapters will be from mattie's pov, but like this one, you'll be getting other characters perspectives as well!  
> song recommendation for this chapter is body by mother mother; bit creepy but a fun listen!  
> love always~  
> \- badkindofbutterflies


	3. Chapter 3

It was one of those situations that you’d always say, “Oh, this won’t happen to me.” You’d see it on TV or in the paper, on dramas or on reality television. It’d never happen to you though. 

Yet it did happen to Mattie, who was staring at her reflection in the mirror and realizing that it had most definitely happened to her.

She’d lost her best friend. 

Her sleep had been plagued with nightmares and terrors. It was amazing that she’d slept at all to be frank, but based off of her reflection, you’d think she hadn’t slept for a month.

After washing her face and brushing her teeth, Mattie threw her hair back in a ponytail and slowly moved out of the bathroom. She sat on the bed and just stared in front of her.

There was a cold anger brewing in Mattie’s belly and she didn’t know what to do with it. Had Jaden killed himself? Did he die of natural causes? Was he murdered?

She clenched her fists and grit her teeth together. As the tension in her body released though, she began to cry again, sobbing into her hands and finding herself unable to stop.

* * *

She roused to her phone ringing. Blinking blearly, she grappled for her phone and jabbed her finger against the accept call button. “‘ello?”

“Mattie, I’ve just gotten word of what happened. I’m so, so sorry.” Beth Latimer’s voice was on the other end of the line. 

Mattie felt a cold lump in her stomach, “Yeah, uh, thanks.” She forced out through gritted teeth.

“If you need to talk-”

“I’m fine, thanks.” Her words came out more harsh than Mattie had intended, so she attempted to backtrack a wee bit, “I appreciate it though.”

“Of course. I told Lizzie as well.”

The blood drained from Mattie’s face. Of course she’d told Lizzie. She’d been friends with Jaden as well and Mattie for that matter. They’d been close but when Lizzie left for uni two-ish years back, Jaden and Mattie were only 15 and continued - mildly - terrorizing Broadchurch. 

“What’d she say?”

“She’s devastated. Her summer break on Friday so she’ll be back then. Perhaps you two can get back to hanging out. Might be good for you both.”

Mattie cut her off, “Yeah, uh, we’ll see. Thanks, Beth.” She hung up abruptly, a lump in her throat as she flopped back on to her bed and glared at the ceiling. 

Her phone buzzed again, this time a text from her mum. 

_Turn on local news xx_

Mattie groaned, standing and hauling her butt downstairs. She turned the telly on, flipping through the channels and stopped as soon as she saw her dad’s image appear.

“The body found on the beach last night has been identified as one Jaden Owens. The cause of death has been determined to be a strangling.” 

Mattie couldn’t feel her body.

“We are currently delving more into this investigation and are using all of our resources to discover who the murderer is. Our main goal is to bring his killer to justice and to bring some sort of closure to his family.”

His family. Those words jolted Mattie out of her dreamlike state. She flung herself from the couch and grappled for her bag. 

Fleeing the house, Mattie took off running down the street, wheeling around corners and flinging herself over anything that obstructed her path. 

Tears and sweat were running down her face by the time she charged into the Owens family back garden. Frankly, under any other circumstances, she’d look no less than absolutely batshit crazy; however, the Owens knew her well and as she burst through their back door, she was greeted by three crying faces.

“Mrs. Owens.” Mattie choked out.

Her second mother rushed towards her and the duo collapsed into each other, sobbing together. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.” Mattie sobbed, clutching onto her best friend’s mother like she was her last lifeline.

“There wasn’t anything you could do.” Mrs. Owens promised, pulling back and gazing at her, “I know you would’ve done everything to help him.”

Mattie gritted her teeth to try and stop more tears from falling. 

It didn’t help.

“I failed him.” Mattie whispered, her lower lip quivering, “If I had just been there sooner-”

“No. We can’t think about what if’s. My boy is dead, Mattie. I want to know who did it.” Despite her voice wavering and cracking, Mrs. Owens still sounded as strong as ever. 

“Mattie?”

Remembering Jaden’s siblings were in the room, Mattie began wiping her tears away and stood up, “Hey, guys.”

Jaden’s younger brother Benji and his younger sister Kiara were both staring at her with wide, teary eyes. She moved over to them, patting Benji’s shoulder before embracing Kiara tightly. “It’ll be okay.”

Maybe that was for her as well, the girl swallowing hard and steadying her breathing. “I promise.”

* * *

Mattie found herself pacing for the rest of the day. There was an unrest in her stomach and she couldn’t help but feel that there was something more she could do. 

She paced all night and it took both her dad and her mum to convince her to try and get some sleep. Every time she closed her eyes though, all she could see was Jaden’s dead body, his blank eyes staring back at her.

The next morning, she was out the door even before her parents, hauling herself to the Hines farm for yet another delivery. 

“I heard about your friend. Sorry to hear it.” Frank, one of the newer stablehands, was watching her tend to the newborn piglets and their mum. 

“Thanks.” Mattie said flatly.

“He was a good lad. He would come and help you sometimes, right?” Frank asked, leaning against the wooden pen. “Seemed like a decent fellow.”

“Yeah.” Mattie stood and glanced back at Frank, “Mr. Hines around? The piglets all seem well off. Even the runt’s a bit plump.”

“Went out to purchase some chicken seed; trusts you a lot, it seems.” Frank observed, opening the gate for her.

“We get on well.” Mattie washed her hands, setting her jaw when Frank continued talking.

“Who do they have on his case? Not often someone gets murdered around here.” 

“How would I know?” Mattie asked irritably, wiping her hands off with a towel, “I’m not a bloody copper.”

“But aren’t ya two coppers’ daughter?” Frank asked, licking his teeth, “Means you should have double the insight.”

Mattie glanced at him, “How’d you know that? Ya doing a background check on me?” She muttered, pressing past him to head towards her truck. 

“Just like to know who I’m working with!” Frank called after her. Mattie didn’t give him the satisfaction of responding though, merely throwing her bag in the back of her truck and taking off.

* * *

“Thanks.” Mattie took her coffee from the bartender and walked outside. She felt weird, seeing people looking over at her as if she were some foreign object. Small towns were invasive, Mattie noticed, and it made her feel exposed.

She strode back to her car, trying to keep her head low. There was the sound of kids skateboarding down the street though, so she glanced up to make sure she’d keep out of the way. 

She watched as one of them tripped and fell off their skateboard. The kids around him laughed, but went to help him up. It didn’t seem that big of a deal to anyone; it happened all the time.

Something turned in Mattie’s stomach, her eyes lingering on the kid on the ground. His image shifted and changed before her eyes, causing her stumble backwards in shock.

Suddenly she was on the beach again, staring down at Jaden’s broken body. 

“N-No, Jaden! Please, why can’t you hear me?” Her hands reached out for him, when a giant wave rushed over her head and she was suddenly drowning.

All air left her lungs as she was dragged under by the rushing current. She was choking on water, gasping for air.

* * *

_Mattie! Petal! Come back to me!_

Mattie’s eyes shot open and she realized she’d collapsed in the street. She was wheezing for air, her green eyes meeting those of Maggie Radcliffe. “F-Fine… A-All good.”

Her chest was so tight and all Mattie felt was the unrelenting urge to flee. Stumbling to her feet, she made the move to get to her car but Maggie caught her arm. “I don’t think you should be driving, petal.” The older woman warned her gently, “C’mon, let’s just go sit down in my shop.”

Mattie just nodded, not in any mood to fight. She could feel everyone’s eyes on her in the street, a rush of shame and anger slapping her in the face.

She let Maggie lead her away though, the two slipping into her bookstore. After the newspaper in Broadchurch had been closed, Maggie had begun a blog and soon after, bought the building she’d run her newspaper in and turned it into a bookstore. Jocelyn Knight, her wife, had retired and aided her in running it, though she was currently out of town to visit family.

“Do you want any tea?” Maggie asked gently after the duo made it back into her office. “Your tea appears to be all over the road outside.”

Mattie shook her head, “Nah, I’m, uh, good, thanks.” She was still finding it hard to breathe, but the panic was subsiding a bit. Clenching her shirt in her hands, she drew in a breath and let it go, trying to soothe herself.

“I heard about your friend.” Maggie murmured as she poured herself a cup of tea. She turned to look at Mattie, who tried to avoid her gaze, “He was a good lad.”

“Yeah, everyone keeps saying that.” Mattie muttered, “Seems like that’s all he was.”

Maggie appeared surprised at her bitter tone, but Mattie disregarded it, continuing on with a snarl on her face, “He was good and now he’s gone and everyone is just going to forget about it in a few weeks.” She spat, her shoulders hunched and her body tense, “He was more than just good - he was real and he was kind and he, he cared about people.”

“But no one saw that because he was different and no one took the time understand him.” Mattie continued, glaring at the wall, “So that’s all anyone can say - he was good.” 

“Not everyone can say that they were good, petal.” Maggie advised her gently, “That should be a compliment.”

Mattie had to force herself to swallow a biting reply. “‘Suppose,” was all she could muster as a response, staring at the floor.

“Are your parents around? Could I contact them to come get you?”

Mattie shook her head, “They’re at work. Besides, I’m fine. I’m an adult.” She stood up and gave Maggie a nod, “Thanks for, uh, helping me.” She murmured, turning away and heading out the door. 

She felt Maggie’s eyes on her the entire time, but Mattie didn’t look back. 

She just wanted to leave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright!! remember that thing I said about schedules and i not getting along, lmao  
> alas this chapters song is mama's gun by glass animals!  
> and of course, comments and kudos are always cherished and loved by i!  
> feel free to ask questions or etc, especially when things begin to pick up  
> might need to write a list of characters so its easier to follow, lmao  
> hope you all are staying healthy!  
> ~ badkindofbutterflies


	4. Chapter 4

“Yup, that goat is full of worms.” Mattie confirmed from where she’d set up her microscope. The farmer across from her frowned, patting the side of his darling goat and looking Mattie up and down, “You sure?”

“You’ll be happy to know that I’m well versed on what a worm looks like, Mr. Hannigan.” Mattie snipped in response, standing up and cleaning off her slide. “I would pick up a dewormer at your earliest convenience. Make sure she’s properly hydrated and keep her on the dewormer for the duration it tells you on the package.”

“Right. She’ll be okay though?”

“As long as you follow my instructions.”

The farmer furrowed his brow and nodded, “Right, okay, I’ll see to it that I pick up that dewormer.” 

“Good. Here’s the list of ones I do recommend and as always, call me if her condition deteriorates.” Passing him a page with a list of recommended dewormers, she offered the farmer a small wave before grasping her bag and heading back to her truck.

“Ah, thank you, Mattie!”

“S’what I’m here for!”

At this point it’d been a week since Jaden’s death. It got harder, which was something that Mattie was not prepared for. She was so angry, but she had no one to pin that anger on but herself. She was too late. She could’ve been earlier. She should’ve asked him to come to her house or maybe she should’ve asked him and his boyfriend to just come over and hang.

His boyfriend. That was a whole other situation.

Not one person close to Jaden knew who he was. Neither of his siblings, his mother, or Mattie had ever seen the lad and had only known that Jaden was dating someone when Jaden had told them a few days prior.

_It’s brand new,_ he said, _I’m still feeling it out._

The boyfriend was the main suspect so far, but since no one even knew who he was, the case was already coming up dry.

Mattie knew that her parents didn’t want to tell her that Jaden’s case was already looking hopeless. There were no witnesses, no fingerprints or DNA evidence, and no sign of any potential boyfriend.

It had her questioning everyone.

Could it have been someone from who’d come back from school for the summer? Maybe one of the lads that Jaden had worked with, despite all of them having seemingly solid alibis. What about one of the kids who’d recently moved into town? What if it was Jaden’s brother or sister and not a boyfriend at all?

Her phone buzzing was what snapped Mattie out of her thoughtful daze. She gasped slightly in surprise, remembering that hey, maybe don’t zone out while driving. Grappling for her phone, she answered the phone call and connected it to her car’s touchless phone system.

“‘ello?”

“Hey, Mads, it’s your dad.”

“Uhuh?”

“Uh, well, remember we’re due to have dinner tonight with the Latimers now that Lizzie’s back in town.”

Mattie had to stop herself from cussing outloud. She’d been avoiding Lizzie to no end. They’d left off on weird terms and frankly, the last thing she’d wanted was to have to deal with that now too.

“Uh, see, well, I-“

“Ya can’t get out of it.”

Mattie chuffed in annoyance, “You didn’t even let me finish!”

“Didn’t have to.” Her father retorted, “Be there, 6 o’clock on the dot.”

“Alright, dad. Bye.” Mattie paused, then reluctantly added a grumbly, “Love you.”

She could hear the smile in her dad’s voice when he replied, “Love ya too, Mads.”

* * *

Mattie made her way into town to pick up some new assorted veterinary supplies that the local farm animal supply store had kindly ordered for her. They got a pretty neat discount that they let Mattie use whenever she was in need of anything. 

Needless to say, she was forever in their debt.

“Heya.” Mattie waved as she entered, not wanting to bother too much with conversation. She made the move to just go in to the back to grab her shipment, but of course, the owner had to follow her. 

“Mattie, I heard about yer friend.” 

Mattie gritted her teeth, “Yeah?”

“Ah, I’m sorry,” was all he said.

Frankly, Mattie was okay with it, just nodding sharply and going to grab the box with her name on it.

“I appreciate it. Thanks for doing this again.” Mattie gave the owner a small smile and began pushing the door open when the newspaper rack caught her eye. “Hey, uh, mind if I take one of these?”

“Course!”

Mattie grabbed a newspaper, gave her friend a wave, and then left. She threw the box in the back of her truck before she moved to the driver’s seat with the newspaper in hand.

Anxiously looking through it, she furrowed her brow and read every word intently. 

Once again, there was the familiar feeling of an icy claw grasping her heart tightly. It was hard to breathe. 

However, her hands were steady as she turned the key in the ignition and sped off like she was auditioning for a Fast and Furious movie.

* * *

It was barely 6 when she wheeled into the driveway outside of the Latimer’s house. She could hear loud voices in the backyard, but they sounded like murmurs compared to the blood roaring in her ears. There was a numbness that she felt, shoving the gate to the back garden open and walking like a zombie to where her mother and father sat.

The entire party looked joyful and Mattie couldn’t help but feel so incredibly bitter.

Tom, Fred, Daisy, Alec, Ellie, Beth, Mark, Chloe, Lizzie, and the youngest Latimer at 6, Liam. All of them looked at her when she approached, at first smiling but then realizing something was off.

“Just didn’t want to tell me?” Mattie had hoped her voice would come out stronger, but it didn’t. She threw the paper in front of her mother and watched as everyone craned to look at it.

Mattie didn’t even let them speak, “Broadchurch Murder Brings Up Old Past.” She recounted out loud, her voice cold. 

“Mattie-” Her mother sounded pained, but Mattie couldn’t even stare at her without anger bubbling in her chest.

“Did you think that I wouldn’t find out?!” Mattie snapped, “Did you think that you could just magically make all of this disappear?!”

“Mattie-” Her father tried now, but nah, unfortunately for them, the youngest Hardy just simply wasn’t having it.   
“And do you realize that this, this makes my entire life make sense?!” Mattie spat, clenching her fists and feeling tears well up in her eyes, “You-” She pointed a finger at her mother, “You failed to tell me that Tom and Fred have a murderer as a father! A man who murdered the son of people I care about nonetheless!”

Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Beth getting distraught. The woman was covering her mouth with her hands and shaking, Mark pulling her in tight. Chloe snarled angrily, “You don’t get to bring this up now!”

“But I do!” Mattie spat at the eldest Latimer, “I do because now I know why I was called a bastard child growing up by everyone in school. I know why I felt like the odd man out in the family, as if I didn’t know some big secret that everyone else did. I know why I wasn’t allowed outside on late nights or why I wasn’t allowed to skateboard or why all of my teachers in school pitied me for what I thought to be no damn reason!” 

“You don’t get to tell me what I can or can’t do.” Mattie continued, her eyes blazing a green fire, “I was never good enough for any of you and now I know why - I was just some damn mistake!” She spat, slamming her finger against a paragraph in the paper.

_“DCI Alec Hardy and DI Ellie Miller-Hardy got together soon after Joseph Miller was acquitted,”_ It read, _“They had a child soon afterwards, leading many to believe the speculation that the detectives had indeed slept with one another the night Miller was arrested.”_

“Mattie, please.” Ellie croaked, causing Mattie to feel a pang of guilt. However, that was short lived and Mattie simply backed up. She shook her head and found it impossible to meet any of the stares of the people she’d trusted for so long. 

Her mouth was dry and she gritted her teeth together, spinning on her heel and stalking out of the back garden to leave her family to deal with the weight of what had just been unearthed after all of this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ooooh ho ho we're getting the ball rolling! sorry for the lack of an update for a few weeks there - life is hectic in these weird times!  
> alas song of the day is 'no time to die' by billie ellish!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw: referenced/applied drug use, overdose

Mattie was drowning. 

Water was flooding her lungs and making it hard to breathe. Her hands were grappling at the empty ocean around her, trying in vain to get herself back to the surface.

She was done for - she was certain of it - and she felt herself losing her will to fight. 

It was then when a familiar hand grabbed her wrist and hauled her upwards, her body thrust onto the beach. She felt like she could’ve coughed up the entire ocean from her lungs, hacking and coughing as she tried to look up at the familiar stranger that saved her.

Imagine her shock when she recognized Jaden.

With shaking hands, she pushed herself to her feet and stumbled away from her dead friend. Her eyes filled with tears and she reached out for him, but he suddenly seemed a million miles away. Another boy, close by, caught her attention and she spun towards him. He was unfamiliar, but something about him caused her to squint and peer for any signs of who he may be. 

She’d seen him before.

Jaden pointed up the cliffs to where a shadow figure stood. The other boy pointed there too and something told Mattie that this figure, whoever it was, may be important. 

“Hello!? Can you hear me?!” Mattie screamed up at the figure, waving her arms at them to try and get the attention of whomever was standing there. “Hello!?” 

The ground beneath her began to crumble as the figure turned and walked away. She gasped, stumbling on her feet and making the move to sprint after them.

However, the world broke and Mattie was left falling into the swelling, dark ocean to drown once more.

“No! NO!”

Mattie woke herself up screaming, finding herself mid-panic attack. Heaving and gasping for breath, she grappled to pull herself upwards and gripped her head in her hands.

Not again. Sobbing and wheezing for air, she could feel the room spinning as she struggled to breathe. 

“I… Can’t… I can’t.” Mattie sobbed, crying into her hands and shaking like a leaf. “I can’t.”

She stayed like that for a few moments, just gripping her head tightly and digging her fingernails in to her scalp. “I’m so sorry, Jaden.”

* * *

\On the other side of town, Alec Hardy was blinking sleep from his eyes as he walked up to the scene he’d been called to. Ellie was fumbling with her purse as she walked to his side, her worried gaze staring out in front of them.

“Drug overdose.” DS Katie Hartford stepped out to greet them, “Or at least, that’s what everything is pointing towards.” 

“The deceased?” Alec asked, pulling out his notebook and getting ready to jolt down some notes. 

“Jake Halloway, 14 years old.” 

There was a brief pause for both Alec and Ellie, the two sharing a look of shock.

“14? And it was a drug overdose?” Ellie repeated, staring doubtfully at Katie.

Katie rolled her eyes, but caught a glare from Alec and seemed to lose the attitude, “Yes, ma’am. We found a needle and heroin on the scene. There’s a band around the bicep of his right arm and an obvious puncture in the largest vein in his fossa.” 

“His what?” 

“His fossa? His-” Katie huffed loudly and rolled up her sleeve, “His this thing!” She jabbed a finger on the junction between her wrist and upper arm.

Both Ellie and Alec released a long, “Oooh.”

They were led to the boy, who was laying twisted on the ground. His eyes were wide and sightless, staring up at the sky. Ellie looked ready to throw up and Alec reached over to gently squeeze her hand and give her a smile of reassurance.

“Have you contacted the family?” Alec asked Katie, who shook her head, “Wanted to wait for you, sir.”

Alec moved to bend over the lad, slipping on a pair of gloves. He looked him over, searching for any signs of trauma. “Have you found any heroin on him?”

“Only residue, sir. He must’ve taken all he had.”

Ellie and Alec shared a glance. It was pretty easy to know that she was thinking the same thing as he was. Two deaths within a couple weeks of each other - that was extremely unusual for Broadchurch - but now there’s drugs involved and Broadchurch had no history of any sort of drug related activity.

“Katie, get in contact with the family and tell them what’s happened. I’d like to meet with them as soon as they’re able.” Alec instructed the DS, before turning to Ellie, “What do ya think?”

Ellie kept gazing at the body, “I’m just getting a weird feeling, Alec.” She murmured, rubbing her neck, “This looks like an overdose, yeah, but this doesn’t happen in Broadchurch. You know that.”

“I think there may be something more to it.” Alec agreed, straightening up and looking about the area. “But I don’t quite know what.”

* * *

Y’know, Mattie had mastered the act of avoiding her parents for the past week or so. She timed her schedule perfectly with theirs so that she never had to cross paths with them and thus, didn’t have to have any uncomfortable conversation with them.

However, when she came down that morning, both of her parents were sitting in the kitchen, staring intently at her.

“Jesus!” She spat in surprise, nearly jumping out of her skin. 

“Not quite.” Alec muttered, sipping on his coffee. 

Ellie glanced at her husband and rolled her eyes. Mattie took a quick second to pray for whatever higher power to simply smite her on spot, but alas, no luck there.

“We need to talk, Mattie.” Ellie began hesitantly, turning back towards her daughter.

Mattie’s gut twisted. “I have nothing to say.” 

“Mattie, listen. You can’t hide from us forever.” Her father was upset, Mattie realized, though she could only shake her head in response.

“I know. I just don’t… I don’t want to talk yet.” 

Silence fell between the three, Ellie drawing in a soft breath.

“A boy was found dead this morning.” 

Mattie stared at her mother in surprise.

Ellie looked sheepish for just blurting that out like that, “He’d overdosed on heroin.”

“Heroin?” Mattie repeated in shock, unsure of what to make of that.

“Please, just stay safe, Mattie. Make good decisions.”

Mattie stared at her parents, simply nodding in response and heading out the door.

Putting that in the back of her mind, she pulled out her planner and ran through the day’s events. 

It was hard for her to focus though. The entire day went by and Mattie felt as though she’d slept through the entirety of it. 

She was still grieving and she knew she’d be grieving for a long time.

Her heavy feet took her to Jaden’s home that evening. The backdoor was unlocked and Mattie let herself in, something she’d done since she was a child. 

“Delia?” Mattie called out for Jaden’s mother, glancing around the dark house. Benji and Kiara seemed to be gone, a pang of worry hit Mattie right in the heart. “Mrs. Owens?”

Walking up the stairs, she heard the faint sounds of movement coming from Jaden’s old bedroom. The door was open so Mattie peered in to see Mrs. Owens sitting on the floor. 

“Delia.” Mattie murmured softly, stepping into the room.

“My boy’s dead, Mattie,” came the choked out reply. “My boy is dead.”

Almost instantly, Mattie’s eyes welled with tears. She opened her mouth to say something, but what could you say to that? Instead, she just sank down beside Delia, gazing at her.

“They took him from me. Who would take him from me, Mattie? Why?” Delia stared at the wall in front of them, her hands clutching onto nothing, “Why?!” She screamed, breaking into loud sobs.

Mattie gently wrapped her arm around Mrs. Owens’ shoulders and pulled her in close. They stayed there, Delia gripping on to Mattie tightly as if she were afraid that if she let go, she’d lose the last she had of Jaden.

* * *

Later that night, Mattie couldn’t see herself going home. As soon as Benji had gotten home to look after his mother, she’d left to go try and get some rest.

That wasn’t going to happen though.

A pounding migraine had decided to make her head its new home, so she drove to the convenience store to get some sort of relief. 

A Dr. Pepper and two Tylenol later, she sat leaning against her truck and nibbling half-heartedly on a poorly made, mass produced cinnamon bun.

Voices caught her attention and she glanced up to see two men coming out of the convenience store. At first, she didn’t pay them no mind, but then she recognized the familiar face of Frank, Farmer Hughes’ stablehand. She’d never seen him around this side of town before.

His companion was someone she didn’t know, looking to be about 20 years younger than Frank. Maybe her age, maybe a few years older, but they definitely were an odd pair to be hanging around each other.

Mattie peeked over the hood of her truck, watching the duo move towards the back of the parking lot. They were murmuring in low voices and the younger lad appeared to be frustrated with Frank. 

Frank got a bit hostile and just grappled his duffle bag, pushing it into the other boy’s chest.

“Don’t get cold feet on me now.” Frank warned him with a snarl, turning away from him and getting into his own truck.

The other lad didn’t look distraught or anything, just frustrated and annoyed by Frank’s actions.

“Fucking twat.” He grumbled, stalking off and disappearing around the corner.

Mattie just stayed there, waiting for Frank to drive away before she moved from her spot. 

There was a weird pit in her stomach, telling her that something was going on. 

What if it had to do with Jaden?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a shorter chapter, this week has been rough~  
> if y'all don't mind, would you keep my family in your thoughts? we just lost my grandfather  
> next chapter should be good tho! i have some devious ideas to get around to!  
> song to listen to would be 'the other side of paradise' by you guessed it, glass animals


	6. Chapter 6

“You can’t be mad at them forever.”

Mattie sighed heavily and rubbed her temples, avoiding her brother’s intense stare. “I know.” She muttered simply in response, reaching for her glass of water. 

Fred leaned back in his seat, “After all, they were just trying to protect you.” He told her gently, his earnest gaze making Mattie want to hurtle herself into the road. 

“I know.” Mattie repeated, glancing out the window, “I do, Fred. I do.”

“I just, y’know, I’m just mad about my life, I guess.” She shifted uncomfortably, “Just everything.”

Fred furrowed his brow together in concern, “You okay, Mats?”

“Yeah, yeah, just been rough the past couple of weeks.” Mattie didn’t really want to go into details. The nightmares and her panic attacks were just getting worse. Everytime she could see the same shadowy man and everytime she could never catch him. A new boy had joined their ranks as well, so Jaden and the mystery boy had a new companion.

It felt like everything was right under her nose but she had no idea on where to even start. 

“Is that Lizzie?” Fred’s voice broke her out of her thoughts and she nearly jumped from her seat, glancing around rapidly and spotting her at a table a ways away.

“Bloody hell.” Mattie hissed uncomfortably, shifting in her seat. Fred glanced back at her and tilted a brow in amusement, “You’re just avoiding everyone, aren’t ya?”

“Not avoidin’ you.”

Fred just snorted.

They both watched as a boy approached the table and sat across from Lizzie. Mattie swallowed a knot in her throat and just glanced away, “We should go.” 

If only it were that easy.

“Mattie!” Lizzie’s voice made her shrink visibly, “Over here!”

“Smite me.” Mattie grumbled, but Fred merely laughed, nudging her forward, “C’mon, grumpy.”

As the siblings approached, a sudden recognition hit Mattie in the face.

The boy across from Lizzie was the same boy she’d seen the other night with Frank.

The revelation made Mattie extremely uncomfortable and she couldn’t keep her eyes off of him as she approached. The boy met her gaze and smiled at her, Mattie forcing a smile in return.

“Hey.”

“Hey, uh, how’re you doing?” Lizzie smiled at her, “Y’know, with everything.”

Mattie really wanted to be smited now. 

“Fine.” She said curtly, “Thanks for asking.”

Maybe she felt a pang of guilt at the hurt in Lizzie’s eyes, but there was really nothing more Mattie could say. She gritted her teeth and glanced away, finding false interest in the hustle and bustle of Broadchurch outside.

“Yeah, uh, this is Dominic. He’s new so I thought I’d show him some of the hot spots around town.” Lizzie informed them with a smile, motioning to the lad across from her.

“Not much to show.” Mattie mumbled, “Just walk ‘im down Main Street and you’ll be done.”

A sharp jab in her ribs from Fred told her that maybe she should cool the attitude a wee bit.

Mattie just glared at him indignantly though.

“I don’t mind that - I grew up in a bigger town and they aren’t all they’re knocked up to be.” Dominic responded, a smile on his face. His eyes were still on Mattie though and it was beginning to creep her out. Had he seen her the other night? Was he gonna say something?

“Where ya from?” Fred asked, ever the conversationalist.

“Ah, Bristol.”

“And what brought ya down here?” 

Dominic rubbed the back of his neck, “My dad got me a job down here. He knew someone who was hiring in my line of work.”

“And that is?” Mattie interjected herself into the conversation once more, studying Dominic.

“Are you detectives or something?” Dominic snickered awkwardly, “Uh, farmwork. I’m a stablehand.”

Mattie’s mouth felt dry, “What farm?”

“Just started working with Farmer Hines. Why?” 

There was the Frank and Dominic connection. They worked together. Mattie’s mind was reeling at this new information, to the point where she’d almost forgotten to respond until she felt another nudge in the ribs.

“Ah, I work as a vet tech. I see a lot of farmers - I’m, uh, familiar with Mr. Hughes.” Mattie laughed uneasily, “And uh, I actually have to go to work now, so uh, I appreciate seeing you guys.”

“Mattie, wait, um,” Lizzie stood up, knocking into the table a wee bit - perhaps more than a wee bit since Dominic had to grab it to steady it - and stumbling out to face her, “It’s, um, good to see you.”

Mattie could only nod to her in response, turning away and heading out the door of the cafe.

Y’know, it might be smart for Mattie to just address her anger and depressive attitude towards everything but smart wasn’t really in Mattie’s vocabulary.

“Jocelyn and Maggie are coming over for dinner.” Her mother informed her when she came down the stairs that morning. 

Mattie nodded sharply, “Won’t be here.” She muttered, grabbing a protein shake and making her way to the door.

Alec looked up from grabbing his briefcase and car keys, “Ah, I believe ya will be, Matilda Rose Hardy.” He snarked, glancing at her and sending her a rather stern look.

Mattie stopped in her tracks, “I have work!”

“No, you don’t. You don’t work evenings on Friday.”

Caught in a bald faced lie - remember, do not have detectives as parents.

Ellie waggled her finger at her daughter, “Don’t you dare walk out that door.”

“Oh, so now I’m prisoner in my own home?” Mattie snapped, dropping her bag and glowering at her mother indignantly. 

“Eh, our home. We pay the bills.” Alec retorted, “Now put your shake back and stop bein’ sourpuss.”

Mattie reluctantly obliged, putting her shake back and plopping down at the table. 

Alec and Ellie shared a look, but couldn’t say anything as the doorbell rang and signalled the arrival of Maggie and Jocelyn.

“Hey you two!” Ellie let the couple in, shutting the door after them.

“Hey, Ellie, Alec.” Jocelyn smiled at them both, Maggie guiding her towards a chair at the table. 

“And Mattie.” Maggie added, giving the youngest Hardy a nod. 

Mattie nodded in return, “Hey.”   
“Oh, Mattie, I do want to express my condolences.” Jocelyn turned toward her, “That kind of loss is so hard.”

There it was. Mattie grit her teeth together, catching a worried look from her mother. 

“Thanks, I appreciate that.” That was definitely forced sounding, though no one in the room seemed surprised. 

Silence befell the room for a few moments, but Maggie clapped her hands together and smiled at the family, “What’s for dinner?”

Dinner was alright, Mattie could admit. They moved to the living room, most of them sipping wine besides Alec, who was nursing a scotch, and Mattie, who didn’t drink.

The conversation was light and friendly, until Maggie sighed heavily and set her drink down.

“Ellie, you know these new possible homicide cases are bringing up Broadchurch’s past.”

Ellie stiffened and Mattie could briefly feel her mom’s eyes on her. She was silent though, despite anger building in her chest again.

“Here.” Maggie passed Ellie a news article, “I couldn’t stop it from being written and I wanted you to be the first to know about it.”

Mattie watched her mother read through it, her father moving to read it over her shoulder. The room was silent for a few minutes before Ellie muttered, “Get this rubbish out of my house.”

“Ellie-” 

“You let someone write this?! You let someone say these things about my family and about my friends, our friends?!” Ellie snarled, crumbling up the paper and throwing it towards the trash bin.

“They aren’t saying anything bad, Ellie! It was all the truth! Dramatized, sure, but still true.”

“I can’t believe you, Maggie! It’s unfair to bring all of this up again after, what, two decades?” 

The screaming and shout was causing Mattie’s ears to ring. She set her jaw and took a few deep breaths, but the anxiety welling in her chest was undeniable.

“How dare you call my daughter a bastard?!”

That was all it took for Mattie’s panic attack to take off. She stumbled from her chair, gripping the ground to keep her body somewhat stable. Air was squeezing itself from her lungs and she couldn’t find the capacity to breathe. 

Mattie once again felt like she was going to die, tears melting in to broken sobs as she shook and struggled for breath.

“Mattie? Mattie!” Ellie was at her side in a moment, frantically trying to get her daughter to at least look at her.

Mattie couldn’t though; her vision was blurry and her ears were ringing.

“She’s having another episode.” Maggie observed worriedly, flinching when Alec spun on her and snarled, “What do ya mean another one?”

“She had one of these a couple weeks back outside my store.” Maggie said defensively, “I thought you knew about them.”

“Mattie! Mattie, please respond to me!” Ellie was crying now and Mattie felt her heart ache at the notion. She didn’t want her mother to hurt.

“I’m okay, I’m o-okay.” Mattie rasped through heavy gasps of air. “I’m a-alright.”

Ellie hugged her tightly, crying in to her hair. Mattie just let her mother embrace her, shaking and still wheezing.

Her eyes befell the crumbled article on the ground and despite her blurry vision, she could still see a wrinkled photo of Joe Miller.

He was grinning wide and in that moment, Mattie felt as if he were taunting her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for so many random updates, life has been crazy here!  
> the chapter is a bit of the filler but i have some draaammma planned for the next chapter!  
> honestly this week just listen to both mamma mia soundtracks  
> love you all and stay safe!!!  
> \- badkindofbutterflies


	7. Chapter 7

Mattie left.

Obviously, it was much to the dismay of her parents but she needed to get out the door to breathe. 

She had to field off many questions from everyone in the room just to leave, but she didn’t want to get into it. She didn’t want to admit that maybe there was a problem here. 

A heavy breath escaped her lips as she walked, slowing her pace as she got into town. It was night, so most of the stores and restaurants were closed besides the bed and breakfast and some bars. 

She kept on walking though, pulling her jacket closer to her body as she approached the beach. Her eyes studied the quiet ocean for a moment or two, for a minute debating on going out towards the water but deciding against it.

Instead, she made her way up the cliffs, taking a seat just a few feet away from the edge. It was then when she really let her tears fall. Within moments, she went from stoic to crying into her kneecaps. 

It hurt. It all just hurt her so much.

Losing Jaden and then finding out what a horrible past her family had was earth-shattering. That, on top of the fact that she’d been called a bastard her entire life and now she suddenly knew why. Hell, she didn’t even know if her parents had wanted her.

She couldn’t blame them if they didn’t. Mattie didn’t really know if she would want herself either.

Drawing in a breath, she wiped at her eyes and sat up more, looking over the ocean with blurry eyes. She didn’t hear the shuffling of feet behind her, or else she would’ve jumped up.

“Mattie? It’s, uh, Mattie, right?”

Mattie glanced behind her in surprise, jumping at the sound of the voice. Squinting her eyes, she took a second but recognized who it was. 

“Dominic, hey.” She tried to keep the surprise out of her voice, but apparently Dominic caught on to it. He laughed and moved to sit beside her.

“Didn’t mean to spook you. I saw you walk past the Trader’s and I noticed you seemed down. Thought maybe you could use some company.”

“Quite the opposite actually.” Mattie glanced at him, surprised to see he wasn’t deterred by her attitude. Furrowing her brow, she softened somewhat and looked away, “I appreciate it though.”

They sat in silence for a few more moments, Mattie shifting uncomfortably. She didn’t know Dominic at all, so she was lost on how to fill the silence. 

Dominic wasn’t though. “I know what it’s like to lose someone. I lost my mother when I was ten.”

One way to break the ice, Mattie supposed. “I’m sorry. That must’ve been terrible.”

“Yeah, well, my dad is a bit of an arsehole so having him raise me definitely wasn’t ideal.” 

Mattie snorted with some amusement.

“I guess I just wanted to say that I’m here to talk if you want to.”

“Er, thanks.”

Dominic smiled at her and they continued their silence. Another five minutes went by and finally Dominic stood and offered his hand to her. Hesitantly Mattie took it and the two walked back down the cliff and into town.

“Uh, would you wanna come back to my room with me? I’m staying in the Trader’s till I can find a flat around here.”

Mattie was a bit stunned, blinking at him in surprise, “Pardon?”   
“I just, um, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to come off like that, uh, I just, I’m sorry.” Dominic looked sheepish, but Mattie was still put off by his question.

“I’ll be heading home. You have a good night though, Dominic.”

Dominic had a frown on his face, “Ah, yeah, you as well, Mattie.”

* * *

Mattie spent the next few days just trying to avoid life. It was coming to a point where she wasn’t completely present anymore and that reflected itself in her work. It’d taken a couple of minor mishaps for one of her regulars, Rubert Hines, to pull her aside and look at her in concern.

“It isn’t like ya to make mistakes, Mattie. What’s going on?”

“Nothing! Christ, perhaps I would make so many mistakes if I didn’t have all of ya hanging over my shoulder!” Mattie snapped in return, pushing past the farmer and heading to her truck. 

Shoving her bag into the passenger's seat, she glanced over and saw Dominic muttering to Frank. Both looked at her and she glared back for a moment, before she studied Frank’s face more and got hit with a bolt of recognition. 

She couldn’t place it, but Frank seemed very familiar.

“Mattie, hey!” Dominic was approaching when she snapped back to reality, “No worries about today. You did fine; Hines is just worried for ya, is all.”   
“Well, he can mind his own business, Dom. Much like yourself.”   
Dominic grinned, “But if I did that, I’d have never met you.”

Mattie visibly wrinkled her nose at him and he grinned wider, glancing over his shoulder to see Frank approaching.

“Mattie, always good to see you.”

“Frank. Say, where did you say you moved here from again?” Mattie asked, trying to place him. Well, if both lads were going to bother her, she’d at least dig up some information.

“Oh, ah,” Frank and Dom shared a funny look. Mattie noted that, tilting a brow.

“From Liverpool.”

“Got it. Well, I best be off then.” Mattie turned towards the truck, but Dominic grasped her wrist.

“Hey, uh, are your parents involved with the case of those two boys who were recently found dead?”

Ah, yes. Two days ago both Hardy’s were called to another scene where two boys, ages 14 and 12, were found dead. All evidence pointed to another drug overdose but what was odd about this one, was that one lad was found many yards away from the other. This alluded to her parents that he’d been running away from his friend. That was abnormal for overdose cases.

“Maybe? They haven’t said much about it.” Mattie answered with a shrug, “Why do ya ask?”

“Just curious, I guess. Always had a morbid fascination with true crime and the sort. That was just a drug overdose though. That should be an open shut case.”

“Not exactly. My mum said the scene was weird for an overdose case.”

Frank interjected, “Ah, well, we all know things can be out of sorts sometimes. Doesn’t mean they’re anything special, right?”

“Right.” Mattie drawled, eyeing the both of them. She was already suspicious of the both of them and they definitely weren’t helping their case. 

There was a brief silence between the three of them, which Mattie broke with a, “I’ll be going then.” She did just that, hopping into her truck and pulling out of the long gravel driveway to head back into Broadchurch.

* * *

“I’m surprised to see you out here.”

Mattie glanced up from the football she was kicking between her feet, surprised to see Beth Latimer making her way towards her. “I don’t think I’ve seen you play football for a few months now.”

Mattie looked from Beth to the football field. Perhaps she’d been naive to think that the Latimers wouldn’t see her despite their house facing the football field. “Yeah, thought I’d try and get some exercise.”

A silence befell them, but Beth was clearly reluctant to give up on their conversation - much to Mattie’s disappointment.

“I haven’t seen you since you found out about Danny.”

“Yeah, well, haven’t got much else to say now, do I?”

There was silence again for a few beats.

“You have to be more sympathetic to your mother, Mattie.”

“Do I now?” Mattie muttered mutinously, kicking the football harshly.

She watched as it rolled away, partially soaring through the sky before landing and bouncing towards the goal. 

“She just wanted to protect you.”

“From what? From Joe? From the press? From being disappointed?” Mattie rounded on Beth, looking indignant, “At least there would’ve been an explanation for everything - for all of the looks I got a school or for the reasons why I’ve been called so many nasty things and why I was made to be ashamed of my parents and my siblings. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve gotten the, “I’m so happy your parents kept you,” like I had the slightest clue why they wouldn’t! I grew up thinking that I must’ve been unwanted and come to find out it was all true.”

Beth was silent so Mattie continued, “Don’t tell me that I should be more sympathetic. I’m sorry, Beth, that you had to go through that loss. I’m so sorry that my brothers have a murderer as a father, I really am. And the fact that my mother had to deal with the fact that a paedophile was sleeping next to her is heartwrenching.” 

She drew in a breath, “But I… I just need time.” Her jaw set as she struggled with the sudden flood of emotions, “My best friend is dead and now all of these kids are dying too and I can’t help but feel like death is just haunting me wherever I go now. I keep having nightmares and I struggle to breathe all the time and-” Crying now, she began to choke on her words, “And I don’t know how to handle any of it!”

“Oh, Mattie.” Beth murmured, dragging the girl in for a tight hug. Mattie clung to her, melting into a pile of tears and angst. 

They stayed like that for a while, until Mattie finally pulled herself together, “I’m sorry.” She mumbled, wiping her blotchy face.

“Don’t be. I understand everything you’re feeling right now.” Beth murmured, gazing at Mattie sympathetically, “But you can get through this, I promise.”

Mattie gazed at her, swallowing hard before she turned away, “Ah, thanks. I should probably head home. S’getting late.” 

Beth nodded, “I’m here if you need to talk.” She promised, offering the younger girl a warm smile. Mattie picked up her football, nodding to her, “Thanks, Beth.”

With a small smile, Mattie turned and walked away, heading up the road. 

She had an odd feeling of being watched as she headed towards her home, causing her to stop in her tracks and look around. 

There was no one in sight.

She shrugged it off and continued.

Perhaps she just imagined it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow, she updated!!  
> honestly this month has been super busy for me but hopefully now that i've pulled myself together i'll update more frequently!!  
> comment and kudos as always, i love and appreciate each one of ya!!


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